Dude it’s

Rawr (r*-*)r xD

Username does not check out. I checked out the profile and was sad to not find any boobs :(

I remember when I was on the healthiest diet I ever had. I took a shit every 48 hours. The consistency was hard, yet smooth and spreadable. It had a diameter of about 2" with a well defined beginning and end. It didn’t take long to exit my body as well. 15 seconds from sitting to shitting. When the toilet was one with a step and the turd chose to stay, I had to stand up to let it all out, or move to let it fall. The emptiness in my bowels caused my balls to cramp not just once. Those were the best. Not even much to clean up afterwards. And not only it opened my asshole to let shit out, but also the possibility to shove things in. Who knows, maybe someday some domina will want to do butt stuff. I’ll be ready then.

Edit: words to make it sound more English and less engrish

I had the luxury to smoke on my job. I smoked a lot.

I’ve smoked 3 packs a day by 25 y/o. Started with 17. stopped with 27. I don’t regret stopping, I feel better. But I miss it.